Mark (timelessness) wrote,

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Holy fuck, not the Snapple Machine!!!

So Mike and I make our quest for Snapple, like we do from time to time. It's a ten minute drive past dad's house to get there, because shit, it's the only place around to get Snapple in a can, and let alone in particular Peach Iced Tea and Grape-ade. So we pull up, and this is what we see:

So we're both like, "Fuck! What's that note on it say?!"

So we pull back around to get a closer look:


So, someone wasn't only pissed enough to shoot our beloved Snapple Machine, they were pissed enough to unload an entire magazine from their .45 into this damn thing. Now, the strangest part is that every bullet was from knee height down. Like a really pissed off toddler or a midget on their knees. And when they shot it, they were so close that the heat from the shot melted the plastic facing as the bullet went through, rather than crack the plastic and force their way through. And you can't say it was shot at an angle, like someone was shooting towards the ground at like a 45 degree angle, because we checked, and the bullets go straight back.

But, seriously, who the fuck shoots an entire magazine into a Snapple Machine?! What monster took out their rage on our beloved friend?!?!?!
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